Drink, drank, drunk

On the heels of St. Patty's Day, and my vow to never again spend a whole night drinking beer and cider (too filling, too bloating), and to stick with my perennial favourite, I was shocked -- SHOCKED! -- to read this in Sympatico entertainment:

The refreshing flavour of Grey Goose vodka and bottled water has broken
Lindsay Lohan's valiant efforts to sober up. The 20-year-old actress, who
left the Wonderland rehab facility a month ago, was spotted mixing a
Lohantini, pouring the demon juice into a water bottle at New York nightclub
Plumm on Thursday, March 15, Us reports. Vodka and water? That's the drink
of boozehound grandmas, not 20-year-old Hollywood hotties.

Now, speaking as just a regular boozehound, I must defend my drink of choice. Vodka and water, I learned many, many years ago, is wonderful for many reasons.

1. Low calorie. The initial reason for my choosing this mix was the calorie count. 5 or 6 fruity or cokey drinks adds up over a night, not to mention the sugar hangover. Vodka is the lowest calorie spirit, and combined with water, well, it doesn't get any better than that.
2. Light and refreshing. It's just like drinking a glass of cold water with a squeeze of lime, and then your tongue heats up a little. None of the fuzzy teeth or bad breath that you get from mixed drinks. It's lovely in hot weather, helps you stay hydrated, too!
3. Is she/isn't she? With a group of friends like mine in university, unless you're DD, you'd better be drinking. Fair enough. But sometimes, you know, you can't afford to. Sometimes you just don't want to. So, a nice drink like vodka-and-water is an excellent choice, since you can switch to water, throw in a lime, and nobody knows. I have been known (very recently) to go to the bar, ask for water, and request that they make it look alcoholic. Voilà! Because of my propensity for this drink, nobody gives me a hard time; they just assume that there's vodka in my glass, too.
4. Fun/excitement. We went to the Dominican Republic last January, and had printed out a few sheets of Spanish For Tourists. Naturally, we were fluent by day 4... which was the day I boldly ordered "vodka y agua". Let me tell you, after drinking my bottle of water and glass of vodka, I was ready to party! (Briefly.) Apparently, "agua con vodka" would have gotten me the mixed drink. Oh well!